Building a rhythm in my day to day has been my friend as the days become weeks, the adrenaline and adventure wear off.

During our transition from school to home school we kept up with some of their school work - the kids needed familiarity and I needed stuff for them to do. The further out from school we got, our day to day started to change.

Here’s what helped me.

• Observe your kids, build your day around their natural rhythm.

• If you have a baby that naps. Use that time as down time/ quiet time - not as time to get everything done because you don’t get to rest then.

• Build a rhythm that doesn’t revolve around you all the time so if you’re having a bad day the rhythm of your house still carries on. A timetable, whatever that looks like for your house, also means you can defer to it rather than having to be the oracle at all times!! ’See what the timetable says’ is a common phrase in our house. It also limits direct conflict with you, especially helpful if its something they don’t particularly like doing. House jobs is a classic one. I also use a timetable to show the kids what kind of atmosphere is required. I just can’t do loud all the time. Chill time is understood.

If you’re nosey like me and you want to know how others do it, there are some really great posts where people give a sample day on the life of their homeschool. These were a great help to me in giving ideas of how to navigate this time in the way that I wanted to. I’ll post a link to them so you can have a nosey too.

At the moment our family rhythm looks something like this.

6am No one is allowed up before 7 - they can be awake but not out of their rooms. Phil and I try to wake up at 6 to have some time in the morning to gather ourselves, wake up, meditate, yoga, exercise, pray, take your 26,000th online place in the benefits queue, whatever. This is relatively new feature in our house.I’ve tried to do this before but it just wasn’t something I could manage with kids waking up through the night, late nights, unpredictable days, waking up and some how babies in your bed.

7am Breakfast (mostly done by Phil) and a walk in the woods (bring the dog- he’s on loan, must not forget him!)

9am Joe Wicks PE The Body Coach

9.30 Showers, teeth and morning jobs (dishwasher, breakfast cleared, beds dressed, clothes put a way, windows opened, curtains drawn, wash load put on or hung out)

10am

We have a snack at 10… usually fruit, something simple and doesn’t require any clean up. I’ll make a cup of tea and switch my brain on.

-Morning check in at the table.

-On Monday’s with the older two we make a weekly plan and decide all the work and responsibilities that they have that week. They then crack on with that and I’ll check in with them every morning during this time to see what they need help with. After 12 every day I’m not available for school work help. I find it too hard to switch in and out of subjects and different kids demands. By lunch time I’m also pretty mashed and need some time to switch off.

-I’ll also use this time to do some focused connection with the younger two. This can look like a variety of things school work, lego, whatever they’re into at the time. I try to check in with them at the point sometimes both at the same time sometimes separately. It’s not for ages and if the older two need me for something, they have to wait.

-If I’ve lots of work to do with the older 2 I’ll put on something educational on the TV for a bit for the younger 2 to watch

11:30am ish I’ll start making lunch, sometimes the kids do this if I need space or am engrossed in something with someone else.

12 noon clear the table and lunch - they all take responsibility for tidying their own stuff up after lunch

After lunch they all have to go outside to the garden or if it’s a rubbish day and the weather is bad we default to room time. Essentially I need time out at this point and the kids can have quiet time. They go to their rooms/ a predefined space and do things they can do buy themselves. We have a list of stuff that they can do during this time. If my door is closed they must not disturb me.

After this we do general stuff the kids want to do - projects outside if the weather is good, creative stuff. I bumble about between them all keeping the peace mainly. We also use this time for house jobs - they all have things they are responsible for keeping on top of.

3.30pm we wind things down and get the house back to some kind of order.

4pm screens only when all jobs and responsibilities are done and stuff is put away. Tech is their currency. If they want the freedom to do what they would like they have to have completed their responsibilities. I cook tea, catch up on other bits that I don’t want children with me while I’m doing it.

5pm ish Dinner

After dinner, Evening jobs are done and when Phil's not working late, It’s Mum and Dad couch time where we check in with each other with the question. ‘How’s your heart?’ Its really important that you do this with all the kids around and not when they’re in bed. Kids have to see you prioritising each other above them for 15/20 mins a day and they don’t have permission to not disturb you. If you have little ones, do what you can to make this happen too. Pay the older ones 20p to look after them. It’s also really important you don’t use screens to make this time work. Your kids exist in the space between you and your significant other.

Rachel x